Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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