brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
