I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
