I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
