***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
