Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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