A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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