Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
