He asked to "fluff my boner.."
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
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