Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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