It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize