I'm so fucking centered right now
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Randomize
