Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
She announced her abortion via fbk
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
