Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize