$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize