dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
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