he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
