At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Hippo gnu deer
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Randomize
