Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
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