Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
foreskin is a definite game changer
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Randomize
