I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
Randomize