If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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