I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
