Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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