I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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