You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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