Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
