Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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