why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
