You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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