No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
