Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Randomize
