this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
