You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
