I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize