I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
