Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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