I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Randomize
