Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize
