cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize
