I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
now i know why i became what i already was.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
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