I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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