I will die if light touches me.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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