Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
