I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
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