Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
