omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
