I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize