Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
