make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Randomize