i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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